It's been one of those days where any attempt that I've made to make sense to myself has been rendered futile by outside circumstances. I feel the only way to remedy this is to make no attempt to make sense at all and merely rattle off everything that is bouncing around in my jumpy castle of a head at the moment.
: The picture on the wall is crooked.
: I can't breathe. This man cub is treating my right ribcage like it's a couch cushion he wants to warm his cold feet with.
: I am worried about Phoenix and what to do with him and how to handle him and Oh LORD just this thought alone makes me tear up. His teachers say his intelligence is so off the charts that it's almost a handicap and that he thinks about and is dealing with emotions and anxieties normally reserved for adults and he's SO SENSITIVE. He is paralyzed by his need to be perfect in everything, which, to the outside world, comes off as laziness. I am scared at how much he is like me. So much like me. Heaven help my sweet boy.
: I can't wear my wedding rings anymore 'cause of swelling and I find myself obessively rubbing my thumb against my finger out of habit, momentarily freaking out and then realising why they aren't there.
: Zack is still smoking. This scares me and makes me sad and I wish he would stop. We buried his father because of his father's years of smoking.
: Zack's video "Transform" has had close to 90,000 views in 3 weeks or so now and the response from those who have watched it have been truly overwhelming. This has been on my mind a lot lately as I realise just how many of us long for authenticity so much, but rarely know what to do with it when it's right in front of them.
: Getting excited over the lunch meeting that Zack and I have coming up with the guy that came up with this. His name is Brandon McCormick and we're hoping to help him with whatever he needs. Just to be a part of something so, so good.
: I would give anything for some homestyle hush puppies right now. Seriously. I'm drooling.
: My ex-husband is engaged! I'm wondering if I'm weird because I am SO STINKING HAPPY FOR HIM? Truly!
: Watched this YouTube video today that my step-son, Caleb, wanted to show us and flipped out. I had never heard of Stevie before. It's really cool, albeit from a while ago.
This isn't everything I've been mulling over but enough to make me feel a little more sane.
Jennifer wanted to see a picture of my big ol' blackboard that I keep in my kitchen. It's how the Arias household manages to have a modicum of organisation. Jennifer, this is for you, friend.